the single life

Is it wrong to thank an ex for breaking up with you?

I honestly was inlove with my last boyfriend and thought he coulda been the one, we were so happy together and things really worked BUT it was also really hard because of the distance. That was the biggest issue and it was ultimately the reason we broke up. Looking back I see maybe we weren't meant to be soo I'm just going to have fun and live my life, the single life!

I'm pretty sure we're all single now, J B and S!

SO now that I'm single and having fun and not whining because I'm in a relationship where I see my boyfriend once a week I'm going to blog more! Mostly because, these last couple nights have been fun :) I'm not over my ex, but I'm ready to move on and have a good time. So a couple nights ago, I went for coffee with a guy and it lasted a few hours. We drove around and had a really nice time. Later when I was home he text me and told me that next time we should cuddle and watch a movie. He was totally sweet and complimented and I had a good time buuut I'm not sure I want to make it romantic. I definitely don't want a relationship, just fun. So we'll see how that goes. I'm happy to be excited about something!

Tonight! I was bored on msn, I've been sick and I'm kinda restless from staying in the house. So I'm talking to this guy and his pictures look kinda cute, I'm not really sure. Hes funny and hes suggesting we hangout, it was pretty late so I was like nah I'm going to pass for tonight.... thenn like 2 hours later hes on his way to pick me up and we're going to watch movies at his house because he is the worlds best cuddler and will heal my sickeness with his cuddles. This sounds promising. I'm definitely not going to fool around with him or anything though, so I think. His profile says hes not into 1 nighters and he's over that stage. I get in the car and o m g he is HOT. Like right away, I'm rethinking my 'not going to sleep with him' idea. hmmm. Soo we cuddled for hours, he was soo cute and really funny. He was engaged before. This is still blowing my mind, being 21 and having already been thru an engagement that was called off, thats intense. SO obviously he says hes looking for a relationship but he's had his heart broken and he is an empty feeling-less boy. So I'm like screw it I don't want a relationship, I'll blow him. LOL he kinda mentioned that his dick was small, but it seemed decent, he was totally self conscious about it which is definitely lame. Then we cuddled more, and joked around it was fun, he had a cute laugh. He was pretty smooth and he made his way into my pants and OMG he was the best, his hands were incredible I was excited to see what his dick could do... So we cuddle for a bit more and hangout in his bed... then well, we had sex and I was like yeah this has got to be amazing if earlier is any sign. WRONG, blah. Little disappointing BUT he was really fun, and hot so all in all, it wasn't bad. I'm sorta interested to see what happens with his though.

The question is... when do I cross the line from fun single life, to slutty?

Yup, I did it.

I finally hooked up with the fireman...and he is now a full fledged fireman, not just a volunteer fireman. I was free the other night and thought "hey, let's text him and see what's up."

He was free at 9 so we went out for some food and catching up (since I hadn't seen him since forever). We had a good chat and when we finally finished our food I thought we were going to go our separate ways. He wanted to come over, but I told him that my dad was home and might still be awake. He said "well invite me over to play xbox!"

With a bit of hesitation I finally said yes.

When we got to the house we went into the basement and had some awkward conversation before he mentioned how he wanted to see me in my morphsuit. I got changed into it and came downstairs. He immediately started rubbing me all over and complimenting my various body parts (ie. ass, which he mentioned was cute)

Then the suit came off and we started exploring each other. Hands in the pants, and eventually dicks out. His was cute, soft, and he shaved which was nice. I just kept stroking it and then thought, "what if I just went down on him right now?" which I did.

I think he was a little surprised but immediately enjoyed it.

He started getting close and asked if I had any towels around. Unfortunately I did not, so he grabbed his $2 undershirt and used that instead...but he didn't quite get everything. He sprayed a bit on my Hollister shirt sitting near by. "Hope you didn't like that shirt."

I did.

Other than that little slip up, it went quite well and I can say I would do it again.

However...there is this girl. The girl from my last post. We've been getting closer again and I'm not sure exactly where it'll lead, but I find myself really wanting to pursue a relationship with her. Hooking up is fun, but snuggling and having a really close friend who's always there for you is more important. She really likes me and I really like her, but she says there's just something missing...that "spark."

Not sure where it'll go, but I'm enjoying my time with her so far.

That's it for this long ass post!

-F

It's a date...but not for me...

It's F as usual.

I'm feeling sort of depressed lately.

I really thought that this girl that I'm into was also into me.

We were supposed to hang out tonight but she asked if I could reschedule.

I asked why and she told me she had a date tonight.

So I was like:

Yeah, I was disappointed.

She told me she wasn't sure if she really wanted to date right now, leads me on a bit, and then dates someone else.

Maybe she's just in a confusing part of life.

Anyways we're hanging out tomorrow night...

PS How ironic is this...the movie we were supposed to watch tonight was "Date Night"

bullshit I tell ya

-F

*UPDATE* Just got a text from her saying that the date didn't work out :)

but she's feeling sick :(

Fun @ Envy

F here again!
First of all I got a MORPHSUIT!

A few nights ago I got invited to hang out with a couple of gay friends. We started off just hanging out in a house but then I mentioned we should go out. Someone suggested Envy lounge (the local gay bar)
Everyone was on board but since I wanted to wear my morphsuit to the club we decided that we all needed some costumes. My friend Andy just happened to have a roman god and sailor costume laying around.
We headed out and when we go to the club we changed into our costumes. We got out on the dance floor and not long after, Andy and I were grinding.
It got really intense! Had a great night and got a ride home from some randoms...

In other news, there is a girl!
A girl that I fancy
A girl that I also grinded with at a club the other night and that I also think I'm falling for.
She came over tonight and we watched Paranormal Activity. She was REALLY freaked out by the movie and kept grabbing my arm every time she was scared. It was cute :)

I'll let you know what happens in my crazy little world.

Can you say...awkward?

It's F again.

I have a story about a super awkward moment that happened tonight.

I had just left work and was standing on the sidewalk waiting for the light to change.

I see these people (men and women of various ages) standing around and sort of looking in my direction and one of them points.

This guy (maybe late 30's) walks over and starts talking to me as if he knows me. He asks if I live here and a couple of basic questions. So I'm thinking he just wants to know his way around. I ask if he's vacationing and he responds with:

"Uhm, well...uh, yeah...sorta"

At this point I'm still creeped out by how close he's standing to me and why he's even talking to me.

This whole time while we're talking I've been waiting for the light to change so I can cross the street. I see the light change and I have my chance but then...

He looks at me and asks:

"So, are you um...funny...like that?"

It took me a moment before I realized what he was asking.

In my moment of confusion and uncertainty around him I respond with "Ohhh, no, no."

He sort of stares at me for a minute and says something along the line of: "No? Oh sorry I must have been mistaken..."

Then he walks away and I'm stuck waiting for the light to change again...while he stands with his group behind me. The intersection I'm at is a busy one and it takes a long time for the light to change. I couldn't help but feel totally awkward standing there while a guy (who for no apparent reason...) asked me if I was gay.

Now maybe if he was younger, cuter, and didn't creep me out right of the bat, I would've responded differently ;)

"you will probably never fully understand men. So just try to understand yourself"

ST8 Guy wants some fun?

Hello Blog Friends F here!

I just started talking to this guy from POF who told me he was looking for some fun, but was really discreet.

I added him on MSN and started talking to him and then realized I never even checked his POF profile. Once I did that I read this:

"Love to have fun, just want to share this with someone!
Looking for a good time as well, maybe some intimate stuff!
not very good at meeting girls, i want to change that
take it slow, see where it goes from there."

WHAT?!

Sooo apparently really discreet means he's not out of the closet just yet...

UPDATE: Just finished talking to him on msn and he sent me some pics. He's kinda cute, but he's 23 and he looks older. Plus he's just not my type. I felt so bad telling him, but if my history has taught me anything it's to get out sooner rather than later. I'm sure there'll be someone else soon enough...

-F